About This Site: Social experimentation meets ever-so-slight masochism... or perhaps it's sadism?

These are the results of a few online dating website memberships. Some of what you are about to read are Guest posts, added kindly from others whom I've invited to contribute. The rest are mine.

All of them are real.

In these posts I simply want to point out the basis of my evident misanthropy.

This website is not about me or my search (however much in jest it may be these days :P ), it is about the people I encounter along the process involved. And sharing a few laughs with you, the public.

Males are highlighted in blue, females in pink - I know its a stereotype, but here it's just a visual aid (and if we don't get around to coloring them by the time you read them, well... 'meh').
I don't censor much as far as usernames or the like, but if it is requested I am more than happy to do so, anyone can just comment on the post.

Let's say you stumble across here and find a conversation we've had online posted below, and you don't have a humour of your own, if you want it removed or the username changed then all you need to do is comment and say so. All too easy, yeah?

The joy of the online world is we can enjoy a level of anonymity - that includes the people featured below - and no one needs know of your little indiscretions... unless you're one of those odd folk who use their full names as usernames.

Which serves as a fitting segue into the following pieces of info:

I am never false in these interactions: my pictures on the dating website are real, as are all of my profile details (ie height, weight, interests, location etc), and I do not pretend to be anything I'm not. If you see me answering what I do for a living and my answers differ: it's because I have several j0bs and it's just easier to only mention one.

I am a 20something Australian female interested predominantly in other females... or perhaps males though my profile does state that you have to be a pretty special male to have a chance.
I do state in my profile that I'm looking for Friendship and people to talk to. (Some other posts: I have selected Casual Dating also, and these both change between 'with a male/female/either' - depending on when the conversation takes place on my personal timeline). I don't lead anyone one to believe we'll get together if we won't.
I do share my phone number and IM contact details on the site very, very occasionally if I wish to communicate further.
I do point out that I am not interested in threesomes or the like; that if I want to meet a guy, I'd add a guy; that chicks are not to contact me and ask if their boyfriend can join in/watch.

Enjoy the chuckles that ensue. I do.

My rough guidelines:
1) almost any contact request I accept, and 2) if possible, they must start the conversation first - I like to see with which foot they lead... and subsequently stick in their mouth.
Sometimes I get bored waiting for the fish to bite... so you'll see me break these rules a few times...

And finally, to anyone out there who is also a member on a dating site and actually genuinely looking for love, I have only this to say:
Do not be discouraged by all the conversations you've had with weirdos similar to what you read here. Real people are out there. Sadly, it just takes a lot of sifting through the sand to find them.
Have faith, patience, but most of all, humour.

Peace.
- the blogger girl

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Llamalland guest post - breaking records!

Even the other guys I've posted conversations with here have lasted longer than this guy:

28 year old ostensibly straight guy requests me, his profile makes a kinda big point of wanting a woman, so I couldn't resist.

Greeting: I like your profile and hope to learn more about you.

adzzys says:
Hi



Llamalland says:
hello


adzzys says:
What u doing.


Llamalland says:
just finished eating


adzzys says:
Right. U gay


Llamalland says:
why do you want to know?


adzzys says:
Just curious

adzzys says:
So are u

adzzys says:
Do u suck cock

adzzys says:
??????


Llamalland says:
Do you?


adzzys says:
No

adzzys says:
So do u


Llamalland says:
then why would it matter?


adzzys says:
Because I want to know

adzzys says:
Do u


Llamalland says:
why do you want to know?


adzzys says:
Why u think


Llamalland says:
I'm guessing you're a closet gay, trying not to admit it and hoping to hook up


adzzys says:
Do u want to suck

adzzys says:
I'm curious.

adzzys says:
And yes hook up

adzzys says:
Yes or no

adzzys says:
Well ??????


Llamalland says:
how much of my profile did you read?

Llamalland says:
You must have started masturbating before you read this part:

Llamalland says:
"I don't get why you'd want to proposition me before even meeting me. I'm not going to accept. If you really want to get into my pants, you're not getting an invitation except in person (and even then, you have to be pretty awesome). I might be open and honest about sex and what I look for, but that doesn't mean I'll just fuck whoever asks without even meeting them!"


adzzys has removed you from their contacts. You can no longer send any messages to this member.

Well, you can't win all their hearts....